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Last Saturday I was asked to give a testimony and preach a short message. Testimonies are awesome and I am so happy for what the Lord did in my life but I look at my past only to glorify God and to testify of His mercy and goodness; only to remember His greatness; only to help others see Him and know if He did it for me, He can and will do it for them that they may live a life of liberty in Him. So giving a testimony of my life before Christ is for me almost like peering through the keyhole of a long closed and sealed door. It does not harm because I don’t personally go into that place, but it is a little awkward as I prepare to see it all as a different person with a different vision. Nevertheless, I am always glad to testify and share His Word as they are forever connected and I am so appreciative of the opportunity. 

Here is something that struck me though…it came time to introduce me and I was asked, where I was from. I didn’t exactly know what to say and it caused something to rise up to the surface of my heart. hmmm… I didn’t see that coming. I live in Gastonia, NC, yes, for about 7 years now. I was born in Rutherfordton, NC. As I child we lived in many places (about 15 to be honest) with our family settling in Shelby, NC after the death of my father. I lived for 20 years in Virginia and loved it. 

But my heart? My heart? It has only one notable rhythm, and it will always belong in one place…and one place only. Home is where my Father is! It is the only real home to me. Maybe some will think I am throwing out a cliche but I am being very real. I have no other home and heart connection. My loved ones are indeed that and I love them so dearly but they don’t define home to me. My pastor talked about an eaglet bonding to it’s parent and that it would bond to the first thing that it knew upon it’s birth. I am like that little eaglet – the first thing I knew when I was born again was my Father! I was reborn in His arms in my dining room and my first wondrous hours of real life were truly only with Him. That is where I first learned His voice. Deep within I feel I know I was born of my Father, before I ever was. So His voice is familiar, though not. I get that so totally and I don’t even know how I do get it…but I do. Heaven has a way of getting into you pretty deep and staying there. I long for heaven even though I am happy to be on earth for a season. This world is not home though, never has been! I think that is why we struggle in the flesh…we are trying to make it something it can never be. This earth is just a path on this journey. This flesh just flesh…dirt and dust. If I look like I am out of place, I am.


Here is my one sentence testimony:

I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me. Galatians 2:20

Posted in Journal

Crucified with Christ – WOW!

Recently, I heard Winnie Banov speak on the following: “Co-crucified, co-buried, co-raised, co-seated, co-heir.” When I heard this message, it excited me because I felt it held revelation for me but I couldn’t quite grasp that same revelation. Then last night during Bible study on Ephesians, Pastor Sammy said that we were crucified with Christ and when He started explaining what that meant to each of us individually, I felt the Holy Spirit flow through my physical body and I FELT that revelation in a very real way. It jolted me. Is that possible to get a revelation in your mind and spirit and body all at once? A knowing in your body? Strange to me how I feel.

2 Corinthians 5:21 – God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.

Galatians 2:20 – I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

So my thoughts….If we are the body of Christ then we were crucified with Him; we were buried, raised and that also means that we were resurrected with Him. Are we seated with Him? What!!! Could it be that we are seated with Him and share all the blessings with Him, now?

Also…if we are the body of Christ….I mean we really are His body, then He is also what lives, really lives, in us since we no longer live. Melissa is dead; God lives. wow… It is not us living but Him through us. I can kind of understand it, even if in an extremely elementary way, but I can’t yet explain (but you know I will try eventually) in my own human words what I get from that. It is making me crazy…but in a good way : )